On Saturday, I saw a story in the Washington Post about a couple who met on eHarmony, dated and after a year, married last month. The groom is a paraplegic and my first thought was, “Wow, I could never do that.” My second thought was “but I SHOULD be open to it.”
This story had nothing to do with me and upon reflection it occurs to me that I could never do that now because my plate is overflowing with today’s challenges. Another one would feel like just a bit too much. But none of that precludes the fact that I went from an initial gut reaction to a judgment. I believe that for some of us, this is the core of our struggle with resiliency and it all starts with our judging ourselves.
Continue reading » You Deserve a Break Today
What looms large in your mind’s eye? Is it really as big and threatening as it seems? Or has something in your life magnified your negative perception of the situation?
Have you ever been cruising through your day when suddenly you morph into Eeyore, Disney’s affectionately animated and sad-eyed, flop-eared donkey who mopes: “A mostly sunny day, to some, can look a lot like partly gray.”
I have. And, when that happens, IF I notice the shift, I feel angry, helpless, not in control, puzzled, and, frankly, hijacked by circumstances. How did I get here? What knocked me so low so suddenly???
Continue reading » Ellie Just Morphed Into Eeyore – Now What’s That About???
What habitual reactions help you?
According to Wikipedia, habits are routines of behavior that tend to occur subconsciously and are repeated regularly. That seems like a good description of a habit and I’m going to add to it. I think habits are routines of behavior and thought that tend to occur subconsciously and are repeated regularly. Subconscious thoughts are thoughts that are there but that we don’t give them our attention. I am suggesting that we don’t pay enough attention to our thoughts and how we talk to ourselves.
Continue reading » Play It Again, Sam
Ok, so the title is a little long, I created it to get your attention- that’s what headlines are supposed to do. If you go back and look at the titles this week, you’ll see that I managed to sneak in at least a little bit of most of them.
This article is the beginning of a new series that we’re introducing here at BouncebackCafe.com. Although we like to think we know a lot, we actually are just active learners who like to share what we learn. We love ideas, new ones, old ones, reframed ones. Ideas – new to you, as NBC used to say about their reruns – can help us change how we live our lives. Yes, it takes more than just an idea, it takes action, but before the action comes the thought… about the idea. (I think I just went in a circle.)
Continue reading » Deliberately Finding What Fits So That We Can Snap Out of It and Spin Into Control
Nah, not that stationary bicycle “Spinning” idiocy – more power to any of you that enjoy it – my body just says “you want me to WHAT???”
I’m talkin’ ’bout a different kind of spinning. In my continuing quest for ways to deal with unexpected and unwelcome aggravations, I offer you spinning – do this after you’ve gone ballistic and snapped out of it – but before you actually leap into action. That’s the time to do a mental walk-around-the-problem looking for new perspectives on the way things are. Yes, pull out your rose colored glasses. Like sunglasses, they have their uses. And aggravation overload is one of those times when rose colored glasses can protect your spirit from the gloomie-rays.
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![monkey sad / monkey glad 05.04.09 [124]](http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3388/3521765615_14d83db731_m.jpg)
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