photo credit: USACE Europe District

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.

— Oscar Wilde

Is it just that we become more aware as we get older or are things really getting worse?  I ask this because this has been a horrible month for news.  Just consider the following:

Last week, a trainer at Sea World was killed by one of the killer whales that she trained.  Friends and family all stated that she would not want the whale destroyed.  It was like one of her children.  Well, occasionally kids do kill their parents but usually that’s a sign of something being terribly, terribly wrong.  Ya think??!!  This trainer was the 3rd person killed by this whale over the years.  (There is a reason they’re called killer whales.)

On Saturday, there was an 8.8 magnitude earthquake in Chile.  The death toll has been surprisingly low probably because Chile was better prepared than Haiti.  Chile’s last major earthquake was in 1960, a 9.5 magnitude with an official death toll just under 1700.  While 1700 is not a “good” number it is less bad than 200,000 (Haitian death toll) by a magnitude of 100.

Greece is about to go bankrupt.  Wait, no it’s not.  Sorry, yes it is.  Oh well, whatever happens to Greece, the next shoe to drop (economically) will be Spain or Portugal or Italy.  Maybe we all should go out and buy gold.

I could write paragraph after paragraph of depressing news.  But why bother?  You can all create your own lists of major and minor disasters that seem to inhabit your lives.  Occurrences that make you question your faith and lose hope in the future.

STOP IT!!!  I know I started it, but I was just trying to make a point – and now I’d like to make another one.

We Get What We Think About – Earl Nightingale

Many, many years ago, Earl Nightingale spoke those immortal words, “We get what we think about.”  This doesn’t mean that somehow masses of people thought the Haitian or Chilean earthquake into being, it means that we see what we expect to see.  And to make it even more all encompassing, when we internalize the feelings that come from a series of discouraging events, we put on those grey glasses.  Over time we allow our shoulders to droop, our eyes to look down and a feeling of “what the heck, I can’t do anything about it anyway” to permeate our being.  Our physiology reflects and reinforces our thoughts and soon it is the reason for our discouragement.  The chemicals that our bodies are creating are reinforcing the bad feelings and we spiral downward.

Make a Choice

It’s time for us to make a choice.  Is all this gloom and doom serving us?  Yes, times are more difficult than they were.  We were warned.

• To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
• A time to be born, and a time to die;
• A time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
• A time to kill, and a time to heal;
• A time to break down, and a time to build up;
• A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
• A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
• A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
• A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
• A time to get, and a time to lose;
• A time to keep, and a time to cast away;
• A time to rend, and a time to sew;
• A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
• A time to love, and a time to hate;
• A time of war, and a time of peace.
• — Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

What choice do we have?  It is the same choice we always have – how to respond.

Group Think

I fall victim to it myself – group think.  It would be nice to be able to avoid the bad news and sometimes that’s exactly what we should do, especially if we’re reacting overly strongly to it.  But in the end, much of this catastrophizing is by the media.

I’ve mentioned before that I am learning how to invest.  One of the side effects of learning about investing is that I watch/read about the economy.  When things are going well – unemployment is down, durable goods orders are up, home sales are up and housing prices are also up – I feel good.  When things are going poorly – jobless claims are up, existing home sales are off – I feel uncomfortable, sometimes very uncomfortable.  The reporting turns decidedly bad or good depending on the latest data.  And then, to top it off, there are those who for political reasons never see anything positive in any of the numbers and won’t until there’s a Republican in the White House.   If I allow them to drag me around emotionally, I’m not just bipolar, I’m multipolar.  (There is no such condition, I just made it up.  I’m a writer, I can do that.)

The problem with all of this is if I allow others to determine how I feel, I’m not responding, I’m reacting.

Get Vaccinated!

Group Think is an illness.  As far as I can tell, it doesn’t serve anyone that we care about.  It’s time to take control of our thoughts and our moods.  If we expect things to get worse, they will because all we will see is the bad stuff.  So, decide now!  Vaccinate yourself against depressing Group Think.  Try these 6 techniques for vaccinating yourself against the general anxiety caused by accepting the catastrophizing going on all around us.

1. Change your physiology. Walk with your head up, a smile on your face and purpose in your step.  Even if you’re not going anywhere in particular, act AS IF you’ve got somewhere important to be.  Project confidence.
2. Change your self-talk. If the news is getting to you, SHUT IT OFF!  Change the station.  Listen to your favorite rock or classical or humorous or inspirational recordings.  Then substitute those thoughts for the ones that were bringing you down.
3. Take your daily dose of inspiration. I don’t know about you, but I take vitamins every day.  I also make a point of reading or listening to something inspirational.  Many of these things I’ve read or heard before.  But I FORGET.  Remember, I come by my bad memory honestly – Alzheimer’s in both parents.  Seriously though, when I’m busy worrying, I forget all the stuff I used to know and I lose sight of hope. (Actually, I think I scare hope into hiding under the bed.)
4. Do something for someone else. In my case, I clip coupons for the troops.  I also collect paperbacks, toiletries and magazines to send to Iraq and Afghanistan.  I don’t have time to organize these efforts, I just collect and pass the stuff on to those who can box it up and send it.  My contribution is to make sure that those boxes have good stuff in them every time they get mailed.
5. Notice the good stuff going on all around you. One of my neighbors just rescued a puppy.  Another found a good job.  Luckily in my neighborhood home sales have been really good.  Last weekend one of the houses down the block sold for 6% more than the asking price in ONE day!!!  That’s a lot of money.  It covers the sales commission.
   All of this adds up to a more positive environment.
6. Look back and see how far we’ve come. Last year at this time, the stock market was going straight down.  H1N1 was becoming a real concern.  Companies were trying to survive by reducing costs, which meant laying people off.  Today, the stock market is recovering, H1N1 has been much less virulent than we thought it would be and some companies have started hiring again.

My name is PattiAnn not Pollyanna, so I’m not going to deny reality.  I just choose to gather together the facts that serve ME in getting through each day.  I hope you choose to do the same.