Optimism is essential to achievement and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress.

— Nicholas M. Butler

Who’s afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?  Well, it seems we all are.  In Love Beyond Reason, John Ortberg goes all the way back to the story of the Three Little Pigs to make a point.  I know you remember the story, but just in case you want to watch the Disney version, you can see it here.  Ortberg points out that every life has its Big Bad Wolves.  No matter what we do, the Big Bad Wolf (BBW) comes to visit us many times throughout our lives.  We never know what form he will take and there is no way to avoid him.  In life, there are Big Bad Wolves and we need to deal with them. (Sometimes several of them gang up on us all at the same time — after all, wolves run in packs.)

What to Do About All That Huffing and Puffing

No matter what form the BBW takes, his focus is to huff and puff and blow your house down.  The question is what have we done to prepare for him?  What helps us keep it together?  What helps us say, “Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin.”  (Have you got ANY IDEA what Microsoft Word does with a phrase like “chinny chin chin” – it goes nuts!  That’s not good spelling OR grammar!)  BTW, at my age, I now resent any reference to hair on my chin!!!

In my last post, The Hobgoblins of Small Minds, I suggested consistency was a key part of dealing with our “stuff.”  Ortberg says that in order to successfully deal with the BBW, we need to have a firm foundation.  He asks about our roots.  Since he is a Christian writer and a pastor, his roots are faith based.

Prayer AND Action

I think we need to have a skill based foundation as well.  It’s not that I object to faith based roots.  They are a good part of a root system.  No, what I’m saying is that in addition to having roots based in faith, we need roots based in behaviors.  Let me give you an example.

Way back in the Pleistocene era, when I was a kid, my little sister fell UP the stairs and cracked her head open while we were carrying in groceries.  My mother’s first response was, “Jesus, Mary and Joseph!”  She didn’t use that phrase very often, just when my sister was bleeding profusely from her head.  But “Jesus, Mary and Joseph” was a prayer.  It was a faith based response.  Before she had finished “Joseph,” my mother had also grabbed a towel and applied pressure to the wound.  She had me bring in the packages I was carrying and had me put the cold stuff away while she called Dr. Jacobs, our pediatrician.  Next, we were all loaded into the car for a trip to the ER.  She had a plan, a prayer AND she took action.  Her faith didn’t lead her to believe that St. Michael the Archangel would swoop down and suture my sister’s head.  She knew she needed to take care of the physical wound herself or get someone qualified to do it.

The same is true with us.  Prayer can help AND we need to create a plan for dealing with the BBW when he shows up.  You notice that the three little pigs ran into their various houses when he showed up.  They locked the doors.  They trembled.  They answered back, “Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin.”  And when one house blew down, they ran to the next until they got to the one made of bricks.  There they were safe.  Even the three little pigs had a plan for dealing with adversity.

What’s Your Foundation?

Here in Southern California, we have our own ever-present BBW.  It’s called THE BIG ONE.  This refers to the earthquake that is SO HUGE that California breaks off from the continental US and becomes an island and Arizona becomes beach front property.  That’s why every time an earthquake starts rocking and rolling, we all wait with baited breath to see just HOW BIG this one will be.

In theory, we also have a plan for this adversity.  We all KNOW what to do.  We know we should have clean fresh water stored somewhere we can get to it after the quake.  We should have “extra” prescription meds, food, camping gear, etc.  The fact is that many of us have some of that stuff, but most of us don’t have it all.  Ellie has a two story house and she struggles with where to store her earthquake supplies so she can “get to them.”

Physical preparation is only part of what we need to do to prepare for adversity and I would suggest that it’s not the most important part.  When we’re faced with any adversity, the real challenge is maintaining an attitude of empowerment.  When we cede power to “them” (or “it”) we stop taking action.  If we believe our ability to find a new job is dependent on some other person, then we’ll stop preparing for the next opportunity that shows up.  In 100 Ways to Create Wealth, Chandler and Beckford ask the question, “Why not me?”  In other words, you may be the perfect candidate for that job, or contract or opportunity.  Trouble is, if the BBW has scared you silly you may not be ready to go for it.

Resilience Tool Kit

We all have a tool kit for dealing with adversity.  For some of us, it’s a good California red.  For others, it’s chocolate.  What’s in your resilience tool kit?  Which techniques do you find most effective in keeping you ready to yell at the BBW, “Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin!”?  Here’s a list of my favorites:

• Prayer/meditation – having a practice of regularly quieting your mind helps you to shut off the naysayers when they start yelling at you.  A quiet mind can create solutions.  A panicked mind just creates more panic.  (See When to Worry)
• A-B-C-D-E – maintain your perspective by disputing the self-defeating beliefs that you hold, especially when under attack by the BBW. (See Optimism is as Easy as A-B-C-D-E)
• Read/Listen to encouraging books – Like Zig Ziglar always says, you need to put motivational ideas into your head every day, just like you need to shower every day.  You don’t expect to stay clean, why would you expect to stay motivated without a regular injection of positive ideas and thoughts?
• Keep/Review a list of things that you are grateful for – Nothing keeps us feeling better about our situation than gratitude for what we do have.
• Exercise – aerobic exercise puts both oxygen and those wonderful endorphins in our bloodstream.  You aren’t prepping to run a marathon, you just need to clear your head and feel a sense of accomplishment.

When the BBW is huffing and puffing and trying to blow us over, it’s important to know how to plant our feet and stand firm.  The five items above help me to stay grounded.  What works for you?